Buddhist Chants ~ How Does This Work?

Before I begin this little meandering, I'd like to offer up a bit of a “disclaimer”. That is to say, this is a commentary and a 'posing of a question'. There are no answers here, so if you're intent of finding answers, this probably isn't the piece you're looking for. However, it has been my experience that often times it is the posing of the 'right' questions that bring us to the answers we seek. In other words, if you don't ask the right questions, you're bound to get the wrong answers, or none at all. To that end, it is my intention to pose some questions so that we may prompt the answers we're looking for. I hope my own curiosity may help you along your path.

Okay...now that I've got that part out of the way, let's move on, shall we?

Being the curious Being that I am, I've spent the better portion of my life looking for and trying to understand the whole concept of 'spirituality'. Not religion. Spirituality. I was reared in the very loving arms of my very devoutly Roman Catholic mother. She loved her God and she wanted us to know that love. I was even enrolled in Catholic school until the 5th grade, when the school went to hell-in-a-handbag (as my Dad used to say) and they pulled me out and enrolled me in public school. This did not, however, mean that I wasn't required to attend church with my mother every Sunday. I was (required to attend). And I went because I had no choice. I was a child and not allowed to speak my mind about such 'important' things. But I do remember, even at that young age, that it always felt 'off' to me. There was something about the teachings that felt innately wrong; I was always nauseous by the time the Sunday service was over. A very large indication of a very sensitive, intuitive child's inner knowing.

By the time I was 12, I'd had enough. One Sunday, right in the middle of the sermon, I got up and walked out. My mother was enraged. But there wasn't much she could do since her choices were to raise her voice (no way!), walk out after me (double no way!) or just let me walk out (what else could she do???). I went out to the front of the church and sat in a shady spot on the stairs under a tree. There I sat until the mass was over and my now-furious mother was stomping her way toward me. The first thing she said was, “Get in the car right now, young lady.” Of course she said it quietly. She wasn't going to let her ire show right there on the church steps. Heaven forbid!

To my surprise, the conversation that ensued was not only civilized, it was a conversation that 'grown-ups' would have. She didn't badger or belittle me. She just started asking a LOT of questions. I can still remember how amazed I was by this. She wasn't scolding me, she was frightened and needed to know if her daughter's soul was being stolen by the devil. Bless her heart.

After that little chat, she agreed that she would take me to the beach (weather permitting) each week before she went to her mass. There I could pray to 'my god' until she returned to pick me up. To this day, I'm quite certain she never told a soul about our 'arrangement'. It was our little secret and she was happy to know that I wasn't being eaten by the devil's evil. Apparently, that was enough for her.

After high school, I left home to explore my world. Part of that exploration was about learning other religions. I was so amazed by how many people there were (are) who bought the stories hook, line and sinker, with nary a thought about whether or not they were valid, true or even remotely connected to god. It simply made no sense to me. Not because I didn't believe in some 'higher power'. But because the whole idea of some god who would 'smite you' if you screwed up just seemed silly. I mean, if this god is “all knowing, all powerful, all loving”, why in the world would it wreak such havoc on it's children? Sounded more like some spoiled brat of a bully to me. No thanks.

So I spent a great many years studying the various religious tenets, always ending up in the same spot: it just didn't feel right to me. Not any of it. So maybe my discomfort was about 'religion', not about spirituality. So what was the difference. How could some people can find this place of peace without going to church? How could these same people seem to emote this beautiful light everywhere they went, yet not to be 'religious'? The more I learned, the more questions I had.

To say that I've dabbled in mountains of spiritual practices is an understatement. I've tried all sorts of different things along the way, and each time I moved on to the next, I simply took what felt right and left the rest behind. Little by little, I gathered my own practices; not those that are necessarily of one particular belief, but rather, of many. The latest of those little treasures is the practice of chanting.

Now, to be fair, I must tell you it's quite new. For me, that is. It isn't something I've been doing for any length of time, which is why I am compelled to write this in the first place. Here's why:

For as long as I resisted this practice (and it was a long, long time), I am simply astounded at how quickly I've felt and seen the changes in my world. I'm talking days here. In a few short days, by simply chanting twice daily, every single thing in my world seems to have shifted. Where there were malicious intentions and angry words, there are now soft words and a falling away of that malice. Where there was fear and anger, there is nothing but a calm that rings of acceptance. Where there was ICK there is AHHHH. And I'm not exaggerating either. It's so obvious, that even people who have no idea I've begun this practice have noticed it when they come through the front door, or when they see my face. (For the record, the malice, anger, etc. were coming from someone else, not from me. Or so I thought Nearly every person I've encountered since I began has commented on this 'change'.

Is it just me? Is it that because I've allowed myself to enter this altered state by mere virtue of sound that I have, indeed, tapped into a direct line to Source? Or to my own Higher Self? Or to what has been called “god” (and what I have avoided at all costs?!).

I don't know the answers to any of this. (Hence the first 'disclaimer') But what I do know is that something has shifted. Something very big and powerful has floated seamlessly into my world. And its affects are so profound, it's impossible for me not to notice. Now...to continue onward and see where this leads me.