The Lifelong Debate of Moms

A discussion that is gets a lot of air-time is that of which is better or right to do- be a stay-at-home Mom or work outside the home leaving children in others care.

Well I've gotten a lot of input from Moms over the last couple of weeks about being a stay-at-home-Mom (SAHM) or working outside the home. It's interesting to see how such debate goes between Moms. Some believe there is a right and a wrong in this.

My belief is that there is no right or wrong in this debate. It's simply a case of what you would like for you and your family. There are lots of examples of Moms who have it both ways and it works and other examples of Moms who have it one way and it doesn't work. I know SAHM who would prefer to be working and I know working Moms who would like to be home.

Personally, the right balance for me is primarily SAHM but with a dollop of work at 4 hours per week. For me, this means that I am the primary care giver to my children and for those 4 hours I work my husband cares for them. For now, that's the perfect balance for me. I imagine that as they grow bigger, they will need me less and so that balance may shift somewhat.

My choice is influenced by my belief that a critical formation period for kids is from birth to age 7. I strongly believe that in these years that the foundation is created in my kids lives. For that reason, I want to be the primary care giver to them and so be responsible for exactly what goes into their 'foundation'.

There is lots of research, debates, discussions on this topic. But essentially it comes back to what you want for your family and what works for you and your family?
So what's the right balance for you? Have you go it now? Or what would you need to do to get the right balance?

I strongly recommend taking the time out of your busy schedule to nail this now. Don't put it on the long finger and then later look back in regret. Take the bull by the horns and figure out either way what is the right solution for you and your family. Try to make the decision independent of other Moms ways and extended family opinions. No one else can tell you what's right for you. I guarantee that getting clear on this now will save a tonne of heartache and guilt later.

Best of luck on discovering the best solution for your family. Remember if it's not how you want it right now, then there is always a way to achieve it. First step is to get clarity on exactly what it is you want.